Savvy Self Growth

Emotional Freedom and Confidence for Sensitive Souls

  • Home
  • About
    • FAQ
  • Contact Me
  • Blog
  • Services
    • Career Clarity Coaching – Sensitive Introverts
    • Grief and Loss
    • Know your Unique Strengths
    • Workshops
    • EFT Quick Start Guide
    • Safe to Be Seen
    • Heal Recurring Patterns
  • EFT
    • EFT Articles
  • Testimonials
  • Liesel’s Newsletter
  • Books by Liesel
You are here: Home / Blog / Self-Care and our Genes

Self-Care and our Genes

Leave a Comment

Every time we think a thought, it usually leads to one or more emotions. Sometimes we’re aware of those emotions, other times not.

Some of us are well practiced in suppressing emotions.

We learn to do this at an early age, because Mom or Dad told us to stop crying, stop being angry, or sit quietly in a corner until we’ve calmed down (they often just didn’t know what else to do.) As adults, we very often still feel the emotion rise, very quickly stuff it down, and carry on with life. We might even think we never felt an emotion to start with because that process is so fast.

Every single one of those emotions has an effect on the chemistry of our body.

Our emotions can have a detrimental or a beneficial effect on that chemistry, as well as our gene expression (whether a gene is “on” or “off”.)

A scientist, Dr Dawson Church, says it this way:

“We must consider the implications of the fact that our emotional and mental environment, which we create as individuals, is one of the primary influences turning genes on and off in our cells… we as individuals can start to use this knowledge to affect our own health right now. “ (The Genie in our Genes.)

Our emotions and self-care

If we’re in a habit of feeling resentful because our needs are not met, we (as individuals) influence our body’s chemistry, and our gene expression. If we live in a state of blame, resentment, exhaustion, and anxiety about too much on our plate, we will eventually create a negative effect on our own health.

What’s the antidote?

We absolutely need to learn to exercise sustainable self-care. Self-care, like I keep saying, is not “selfish”. It’s keeping ourselves healthy. Big difference.

Self-care is making sure we keep our brain and body in the most optimal, healthy state possible… so that we CAN be valuable to the people around us.

That means we sometimes need to Say No

If we want to exercise sustainable self-care, we need to learn to say “no” to some requests. That in itself can be stressful, because many of us learned that it’s not okay, or frowned upon, or “selfish” to put our needs before others. We’re scared to disappoint someone, lose out on an opportunity, or appear weak. There are so many reasons that we shy away from “no”.

Here’s the thing:

Kind people can say no in kind ways. There are many ways to decline requests, not just a blunt “NO”!

One way to say no in a kind way:

“Thank you for asking, I appreciate that you thought of me. I have a feeling I have too much on. Let me check my diary for commitments, and I’ll get back to you in a day.”

That’s it. Who can take offense to that? (If they do – do they belong in your life?)

There are many reasons why this type of reply works well. It starts off on a positive note and helps the receiver to feel good about asking you. It relieves the immediate pressure of giving an answer right away. It gives you time to truly check your current commitments, and then do a bit of EFT tapping (or similar work) to let go of any feelings of guilt underneath declining.

Still uncomfortable? Two things.

✨ Saying no is a skill on one hand, that (like any new skill) needs practice. The first time might not feel comfortable, and by the 10th time it no longer feels like such an uphill battle. Think of a child learning to write.

✨ And… there’s what’s underlying the discomfort. This is key. If there’s a belief in our subconscious mind like “I have to be available for everyone”, it is going to feel difficult. That’s where EFT (or a similar tool) is extremely important to help us discharge the feelings around that belief, so it no longer has such an emotional hold.

𝐖𝐞 𝐦𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐝𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 𝐄𝐌𝐎𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐀𝐋𝐋𝐘, 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐋𝐎𝐆𝐈𝐂𝐀𝐋𝐋𝐘.

Where’s your biggest challenge with saying no or declining a request to help? The skill (How to) or the emotions tied to it?

Share this:

  • Pinterest
  • Twitter
  • Facebook
  • LinkedIn
  • Email

Related

About Liesel Teversham

Liesel helps sensitive introverts to see their sensitivity as a superpower, love their work and practice awesome self-care so they can be energized and make a difference in a meaningful and fulfilling way. She helps them to overcome the fear of being visible, avoiding the spotlight and conflict, being ‘too nice’, perfectionism and procrastination.

She's the author of "No Problem. The Upside of Saying No", which is a handbook for those who struggle to say no, are overwhelmed and exhausted.

Read about the book at https://savvyselfgrowth.com/noproblembook/.

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Recent Articles

  • Goals in Uncertain Times
  • What do when EFT does not work
  • World Kindness Day, 13 November 2020
  • Reacting from Emotion rather than from Logic
  • How Emotional Baggage Works

Request a Free Conversation if you need support

 

Career Clarity Coaching for Sensitive Introverts

Career Clarity Coaching

Popular Tags

anger animals anxiety behaviour beliefs business career change comfort zone conflict dreams EFT emotions energy fear feelings goals growth happiness heart help HSP introvert introverts Jack kindness love needs overwhelm peace procrastination relationships responsibility self-love self care sensitive Strengths stress stuck talents tapping trauma values visibility work

Blogs by Month

EFT Accreditation

Accredited Advanced EFT Practitioner

Strengths Master Coach

Connect on FB

Connect on FB

Follow Me

  • Facebook
  • LinkedIn
  • YouTube
  • Twitter
  • Liesel’s Newsletter
  • Books by Liesel

Copyright © 2021 · Modern Blogger Pro on Genesis Framework · WordPress · Log in

loading Cancel
Post was not sent - check your email addresses!
Email check failed, please try again
Sorry, your blog cannot share posts by email.